I honestly had no idea.
About two years later now and we're moving in together - I've met his family and spent Xmas with them twice. I know most of his friends. We spend most of our time together. I also know he hasn't been previously married, doesn't have kids and has never had a gay experience.
I just don't know anything about how many ex's he has or how many people he's slept with.
And he doesn't really know my history either - not that I haven't volunteered it, but he says there's no reason to know.
I can't help but wonder sometimes though. Were his ex's hot? Were they bitchy? Did they live together? Am I kinky enough for him?
That's probably one of the main reasons for partners wanting to know about their partner's past - to ensure that they are sexually gratified. You don't want to find out he has a long standing history of BDSM and the most adventurous you've ever been is doggy style.
The other concern is infidelity. You've heard the expression "once a cheater, always a cheater" and for those who have been hurt by a cheating partner - it's exceptionally hard to trust again. However, according to Private Investigator, Bill Mitchell (who's solved over two thousand infidelity cases, only about 15-20% of cheaters are repeat offenders - so perhaps that offers some level of comfort. Although varying statistics say anywhere between 22 - 50% even 70% of partner's cheat in a marriage - but I have my suspicions that these tests and statistics are conducted by online spy software companies - and PIs like Mitchell - trying to hock their wares. The NYTimes quotes the National Opinion Research Center that says 1/4 of men and 1/6 of women cheat.
So are we paranoid in our desire to know about our partner's past? Is it pivotal to our future happiness? Is it true once a cheater always a cheater?
Your thoughts!!
No comments:
Post a Comment